Archive for the ‘Adoption awareness’ Category

Open adoption can be interesting

December 3, 2016

Our annual open adoption Christmas party was on Sunday afternoon. 

We picked up Reid’s birth mother, her husband, and her oldest daughter. Following logic, also his half sister. We last saw her over five years ago. She’s about four months older than Tate, but a school year ahead. We immediately noticed that his birth mother’s hair was dyed blue. 

It’s hosted by our local Children’s Aid to allow adoptive and birth families to connect at a neutral site. Everyone is invited to bring appetizers to share. 

It went pretty well. A fun time was had by all. 

As we were driving to drop them off, Reid asked, “Why is your hair blue?”  I just about busted a gut trying not to laugh.  We told him because It was dyed that colour. That’s good for now.  

On Monday night we were driving home a different way, which was by their apartment. Reid asked.”Who we pick up?”  I told him their names, as that’s who he knows them as. 

We’re not really sure how much of a concept he has about adoption, so we haven’t really told him. We’re not sure exactly what to say, but we will have to be prepared. 

Observations in Adoption Month

November 19, 2016

Adoption is a life changing experience, both for the adoptive parents and adopted child. 

Adoption is romanticized in the media. They don’t necessarily tell the whole story, along with the bumps and warts that are come along with real life. 

They don’t necessarily know about the challenges that can be part of the journey, especially when adopting from foster care.  

To be fully aware of the potential issues, talk to adoptive parents. 

Adopting an older child

October 8, 2016

Here’s a heart warming story about the adoption of an almost 18 year old, just before he aged out of foster care. 

How one loving couple changed an 18 year old foster kid”s life 

What about closed adoptions?

April 4, 2016

Much has changed around adoption in the past 40 or 50 years. 

Back in the old days, adoptions were often closed.  Little was known about the family of origin. 

There is a very broad spectrum between open and closed adoptions. Adoptions foster care system are often closed, usually related to safety issues. 

We have not met our oldest son’s family of origin at all. We have some information, but not much. He is aware he is adopted, and has been since he has been very young. 

We see our younger son’s birth mother a couple of times a year. There are other siblings we know of, but don’t really make contact. He doesn’t really know about the other connection. At some point, it will come up. We won’t hide it, but we won’t force the issue. 

Much less is said about closed adoptions. Here is a link to an interview, What an adoptee wants you to know about closed adoptions, an interview Mike and Krisitin Berry conducted with their daughter, Jaala. For more background information on their family and story, see Confessions of an adoptive parent

In adoption, no two situations are identical. Each relationship evolves over time, either closer or further apart. 

I have heard it said that different isn’t wrong. It’s just different. 

Adoption in the media

January 31, 2016

Whether you love th or hate them, the Robertson family of Duck Dynasty fame doesn’t beat around the bush.

We saw sme ads for a new reality series outlining the journey of Jep and Jessica as they pursue adoption.

This series iis Jep and Jessica:Growing the Dynasty, on A & E. The link is :http://www.aetv.com/shows/jep-jessica-growing-the-dynasty

We have seem three episodes so far.

They discuss a bit abut their journey to adoption, and how they integrate the new baby into their family. It also shows the extended family coming to meet the new baby.

I thunk it is well done, albeit a bit fluffy.

It presents adoption in a very positive light.

Adoption awareness is very important.  There are thousands of children waiting for a forever family. Very few are babies. All need families.

Adoption isn’t necessarily for everyone. It can be a tough road, especially when journeying down the spare dealing with challenges that happened in utero.

Everyone around adoptive families can help. Offering to help with an errand, or provide child care could be a huge blessing.  The need is even greater for families that have children with special needs.

Open Adoption Christmas Party

December 9, 2015

Reid and I attended the annual open adoption Christmas party with his birth mother and her fiance this past weekend.

It was the fifth time we have  attended this event.  We agreed to meet with her a couple of times a year when she consented to his adoption.

We have always been open with the fact that our kids are adopted.  It is a challenge to share what is appropriate, for both the age and developmental stage of the child.  Tate understands, and is comfortable with it.  He has asked some questions, but nothing too difficult. Reid hasn’t really reached that point where we can share much with him.

It is good to maintain contact with the family of origin.  I’m not sure if it will become awkward at some point.  Time will tell.

There are many families that attend year after year, and have a good relationship.  Hopefully that will be our journey as well.

Reflections

November 17, 2014

Foster care can be a tough gig for everyone involved.

Children are removed from their families.  Some go back.  Some don’t and are placed for adoption.  Some adoption placements break down for various reasons.

It is serious to remove a children from families.  Everyone is affected.  Children end up feeling angry and resentful.  They wonder what they have done to deserve this.

November is adoption month.

World adoption day has passed, with no comment from me.

Not everyone is called to foster or adopt.  It is difficult yet rewarding work.

Everyone can be provide some sort of support.  Be a friend.  Offer a listening ear.  Offer to watch the kids for a couple of hours so the parents can go and do errands or just be together alone.

Social media and searching for birth parents

March 26, 2014

I saw an interesting story in the news today.  Here is a link to the CNN news story.

Katheryn Deprell put a post on Facebook asking people to help her find her birth mother in early March 2014. Within three weeks, she had found and reunited with her birth mother.  It was a happy reunion. They plan to meet again.

This shows the power of social media in a positive way.

Ten things adoptees want you know

February 26, 2014

Our local Family and Children’s Services posted a link to an article on their Facebook page to an article by Lesli Johnson on the Huffington Post website about ten things adoptees want you to know.

Here’s three link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lesli-johnson/adoption_b_2161590.html

Open adoption in the media

January 13, 2014

I have been following openadoptionbloggers.com for a while. They cover a wide variety of adoption issues.

A post today talked about a TV show, based on the story about a reunion between a birth mom and the son she placed for adoption a number of years earlier.  Here is a link to the review. http://openadoptionbloggers.com/2014/01/13/kirstie-a-shallow-take-on-adoption/

The show is on TV Land, so it is likely on available in the US initially.


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